I feel so confused right now. I'm 17 and I think life is just moving too fast. I feel like I'm losing in touch with the people around me or maybe it's because I'm not able to be honest with them. Right now, it seems like there is this huge distance between me and my friends. I talk to them but I feel so disconnected because all I can think about is the end. School is ending and when things end, people drift apart. Hopefully, this won't happen.
Maybe it's just me being paranoid. Honestly, the past few days have been a little hard as the uncertainty of the future makes me question all that I have right now. I'm conflicted about what I want to be, what I need to be and what I am. Pressures of being that perfect person with no insecurities and negativity is making me just that, insecure and unhappy. Can the world just stop for a minute? I don't want to compare myself to anyone else. I don't want to get involved in the line of pointless thinking but my fucking mind somehow manages to drag me into it. Right now, I feel like calling each and every one of my friends to tell them how important they are to me.Because they are. I also want to tell myself about how important I am. How I will always be there for myself. I want to be honest with myself. I am putting myself out of the pressure of getting the highest grade, writing an amazing book, writing a catchy song, being as creative as I would like to be and always aiming for perfection. Fuck perfection because it isn't worth it. Being stressed out and writing a song just makes the whole art pointless. Focus on a few goals at a time and do not distract yourself with other goals until you've achieved the present ones.
The thing about wanting quick success is that you'll always be disappointed. It's what I always end up wanting and then pressurising myself. I really need to take things slow and not get stressed out about the future.
- 11:22 pm thoughts
Maybe it's just me being paranoid. Honestly, the past few days have been a little hard as the uncertainty of the future makes me question all that I have right now. I'm conflicted about what I want to be, what I need to be and what I am. Pressures of being that perfect person with no insecurities and negativity is making me just that, insecure and unhappy. Can the world just stop for a minute? I don't want to compare myself to anyone else. I don't want to get involved in the line of pointless thinking but my fucking mind somehow manages to drag me into it. Right now, I feel like calling each and every one of my friends to tell them how important they are to me.Because they are. I also want to tell myself about how important I am. How I will always be there for myself. I want to be honest with myself. I am putting myself out of the pressure of getting the highest grade, writing an amazing book, writing a catchy song, being as creative as I would like to be and always aiming for perfection. Fuck perfection because it isn't worth it. Being stressed out and writing a song just makes the whole art pointless. Focus on a few goals at a time and do not distract yourself with other goals until you've achieved the present ones.
The thing about wanting quick success is that you'll always be disappointed. It's what I always end up wanting and then pressurising myself. I really need to take things slow and not get stressed out about the future.
- 11:22 pm thoughts
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